Post by Elisabetta Vatielli on Mar 29, 2018 0:51:50 GMT -8
Who has not yielded to the sweetness and bitterness of impossible loves? The best example of this category is adolescent love. What was felt for the professor or the professor of English. A platonic love that satisfied itself with a look or a smile, which left it to dream big, but which did not allow to reach concrete objectives. There was also a certain enjoyment fantasizing about that love.
There are certainly also the impossible loves towards a singer, an actress or any famous person. It is those affects that settle on someone we see, even if the person in question does not even know that we exist. We perceive it as familiar, but in reality it is light years away. Even so, many teenagers and even some young people and adults have felt this feeling.
"Love is like a war: easy to start, difficult to finish, impossible to forget".
-Henry Louis Mencken-
We cannot miss the impossible loves properly so-called. These are born and come on, but are wrapped in misfortune or real obstacles. They are feelings that are experienced with intensity and that, in one way or another, never die.
The various types of impossible loves
Experts say there are three kinds of impossible loves. One is phantom love, the other is narcissistic love and, finally, there is difficult love.
The first corresponds to those cases in which one falls in love with someone who does not exist. You need love and win a person characteristics and virtues that, in reality, does not have. Almost always this person represents a way to fill our childhood shortcomings.
There are also the impossible loves of a narcissistic nature. They are impossible because they are never found. It is believed to deserve someone so perfect that they can spend their whole life searching for it without finding it. It is to love the void or to desire an exalted version of one's ego. In these cases only a great solitude is obtained. Nobody can realize this fantasy.
Finally, there are loves impossible because of difficulties. These are loves for which we must struggle a lot to make them come true. There are specific situations that make certain loves really very difficult. For example, the person in question already has a partner or it is someone who will not fall in love with us or, again, there are strong religious or ideological contrasts that prevent them from being together.
To this last group belong also the cases of the great loves that become impossible due to the death of one of the two. The person dies, but the love that unites us to her does not die. For some time, one remains trapped in the contradiction of loving someone who is gone.
The charm of impossible loves
These are impossible loves that lead us to discover the poet in us. The most pragmatic have never tried it, but they have lost a hellish and wonderful experience at the same time. All loves need a touch of impossibility to feed themselves, to keep the desire alive.
When this impossibility is absolute, the soul burns, and with it the creativity and the sensation of living and dying in a single moment.
Impossibility in love is experienced, more or less, as a vital tragedy. At least that's what you try while you struggle to make them real. They are loves full of torment and that lead us to live in the paradox of not being able to abandon them, but of not being able to reach them.
They are suffered and appreciated at the same time. They are both ecstasy and abyss.
Despite everything, they have a unique charm. They put us to the test, challenge our most intimate dimension. And one thing is certain: they never forget. They are never remembered with indifference. Pale with time, they fill with reality, but they do not cease to be a spark that occasionally accelerates the beats of our heart.
In some cases, however, impossible loves turn into ballast. It happens when we can not abandon our imagination and blindly grasp it. When we fail to give way to the frustration that comes from accepting that not the story we wanted was not possible. In these cases there is a terrible pain and one can even get sick. However, to learn to love really, impossible loves are undoubtedly an excellent school.